Mother’s Day when your mom is gone

I have learned over the last few years, that everyone struggles differently even in the middle of the same situation… And for so many as we celebrate Mother’s Day this coming weekend,  we will smile and we will enjoy the celebration of maybe our wife, but there is that thing on the inside that reminds you your mom is gone.

So, how do you handle holidays such as Mother’s Day when you have no mother? What I have learned is remember the good moments. Don’t remember or  dwell on the fact that your mom is gone, but dwell and think about all of the great moments that you had while she was alive. I have found that a lot of ways you can honor your Mom (although she’s gone)  is by posting pictures of her on social media. ( take a lot of pictures while she is alive, because I have very few of my mom and I together.  Pictures will become extremely valuable one day, trust me) I know we get a little tired of all of the social media post, but it really becomes a great outlet for that grief you feel on days like this… You can post a picture of your mom and maybe yourself at a fun gathering, and it will steer your mind toward the moments and the life she lived…not the fact that she is no longer with you this year.  Maybe even share some sweet stories or moments with family at the dinner table on Mother’s Day.  

A favorite story that my mom would often tell, she and her sister Judy, went to Mexico and they were shopping in a large shopping mall… and as they were shopping, a very expensive handkerchief somehow had fallen in my mom‘s purse, and she did not know it. As she went to leave,  not knowing the handkerchief was in her purse,  the security of the store apprehended her and took her in the security office…  they had decided they were going to press charges. Now, I don’t know if you know much about Mexican jails, but is definitely no place that you want to be and especially not a place for my 5 foot tall, prob 100 pound mother… her sister Judy, who we all know is a bit on the wild side… To say it mildly… She decides that she has got to do something.. she is not going to let this situation go down like this,  so she goes outside of the store, to the window in the security office and she was able to pry the window open …. The security officer had stepped out of the room …  she poked her head in the window… sees my mom and says come on Linda, we have got to get out of here, I am not letting you go to jail…   my mom began to argue and say Judy we can’t do this… But after a few moments she talks her into “breaking out“ so here goes my mom, climbing up on the desk trying to get through this very small window in the top of the wall, when she gets halfway in and halfway out…suddenly, the security officer returns to the room and grabs her by the leg  and begins to pull her back into the room, yelling at her in spanish…  so my mom, the sweet ministers wife is halfway out of the window, her sister Judy is pulling her one way and the security officer has her by the leg and is pulling her leg… Just as I am pulling your leg right now… LoL  I know this is a very corny story…..but my mom and her sister Judy, would get around company and began to tell this story and they would have every detail lined out playing this terrible prank on people….of this “adventure” in Mexico, that these two sweet ladies were on….  and then they would do just as I did to you… the security guard was pulling my moms leg and then they would say just like we are pulling your leg… The crowd often times would laugh, at times they would get mad… And at times they would have expected no difference from these wild women.

So if your mom is no longer with you this year, tell funny stories or stories that stir the warm emotions… not the fact that she is gone… And if your mother is still alive and well, honor her this year. Do something special, go out of your way… whatever it takes let her know that you appreciate her and love her. I know I have said this before but there will come a time when you have spent your last Mother’s Day with your mom and you will remember that last Mother’s Day… Make it a good one this year!  Happy Mother’s Day to all of the moms out there who had to raise bad children like my mom did (mostly it was my brother and sister, I was a good child)

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